May Day

To celebrate this rite of Spring, perhaps I will go to Ikea in Red Hook, get myself a plate of Swedish meatballs and set up camp in the kitchen area and watch couples debate the merits of FÖRHÖJA versus STENSTORP.

If you ever feel bad about being single, go to Ikea on a Saturday and watch the aggravation and despair mount between young lovers. I am surprised there isn't a couples counselor room on location. Perhaps even a space where one could renew vows. Nothing can wear down a relationship more than shopping for living room furniture. The minutia of picking the ideal wine glasses--Classic? Squared? Color? It's hard enough to choose things on ones own, but throw someone else into the mix and it could become easier, or just exponentially more difficult. The thing about opinion is that when someone you love and admire disagrees with you, suddenly your tastes are in question. It's hard not to feel judged. Mix in some stale air and a lot of squawking kids running around, and explanations become clipped. The end result is suddenly the person you want to nest with has excrutiatingly poor taste. How can you not question this life altering decision?

Show me a couple that agrees on everything in IKEA and I will take it all back. But not my meatballs. I am gonna keep the meatballs.